A Sister’s Perspective
By Rachel Harriman
Children live a similar routine at daycare. The day consist of arts and crafts, naptime, eating and playing on the playground. While I loved all of these except for naptime, my favorite part of going to preschool every day was coloring. I had loved crafts from an early age and would always show my parents the art I made each day. One evening upon arriving home from childcare, I ran through the front door with my drawing. I was so eager to show my older sister, Hannah. Since I had seen Hannah read braille before, I understood that using her fingers was equivalent to me using my eyes to see. I ran up to her, took her fingers and guided them over each thing I had drawn, explaining what each thing was and what color I had made them. I described the art I made in such a way that she could understand what my picture contained. That was the day my mom told me about Hannah and how she was DeafBlind.
As siblings, we catch on to subtleties and how to accommodate them. Being a sibling of someone with a disability has made me a better person. I see what the world has to offer and where it falls short. That being said, I get angry at the world and the people in it for not being fair to my friends and family with disabilities. I take it upon myself to help others with equal accessibility. I am a better person for being able to identify and find solutions to flaws in the world. I find myself getting irritated at strangers for staring and pointing at my sister. If someone is looking at her, sharing a simple smile instead of just a scowling face can change my day in an instant. Being a sibling makes me feel protective of Hannah, wanting to stick up for her or tell someone off for being so blatantly obvious of how clueless and judgy they are. I know that the only way for someone to understand and change behavior is to raise awareness and teach. Sometimes it is hard to find the patience to do that. I am still learning how to adapt to the needs of my sister and other people with disabilities I know and will know in the future.
As I have easily adapted to Hannah’s blindness, I have adapted to her loss of hearing as well, but I will admit, adapting to hearing loss is a bit more challenging for me. If I’m in a cheery mood and find myself whistling, I need to catch myself and stop, since Hannah’s hearing aid will amplify the sound in her ear. I love to listen to my loud rock music, but when Hannah is in the car with me, I turn it down or off so she can hear without excess background noise. When we are going to eat in public, I will think of where Hannah needs to sit before I let anyone else sit down. She has hearing loss in her left ear, so I find a spot for her on the far left end of the table so that other people are either to her right, or across from her. Hannah is also my roller coaster buddy. If we are going on a ride, she will always be on my left so we can communicate better through the process of getting on and off, as well as riding the ride. It is second nature to me now, but it is so important to meet the needs of people and accommodate them as much as possible.
Being a sibling of someone with a disability is a challenge and a blessing. I have cried myself to sleep in the past just thinking about how unfair the world is. Why can I see the beauty in life, but Hannah, and many others I love, don’t have the privilege of doing so? I don’t find myself crying over this as much now, as I know that they aren’t missing out on beauty. They are able to find beauty in different ways. ~
Editor’s note: This article is contributed by the sister of one of Minnesota Hands & Voices D/HH Guides, Hannah Harriman, and it was originally published in the Minnesota FOCUS Newsletter Jan/Feb/March 2022 Edition.
H&V Communicator – Spring 2022